awe hell.

I went to go put on a pair of my ideal jeans and I couldn't button them up. Somehow, over the past 2 months, I've put on at least 10 lbs. I wouldn't mind the weight except none of my pants fit anymore. No. That's a lie. I do mind the weight. I feel disgusting. Just from this 10lbs. Now... I've never been a big person, I have a relatively tiny frame. So putting 10lbs on something not very big to begin with, shows. Dramatically shows. I can't even be bloated without it looking like I'm 4 months pregnant.

So after looking down and seeing the bulge, I spiraled into a manic episode. My eating habits have finally caught up to me. My metabolism is slowing down REALLY fast and if I don't stop the weight gain now, I may end up in mental place that I have never been before. And that scares the shit out of me.

But it brought me to the thought of just how intense our physique mentality is. It really can control some of the toughest women.

I'm going to do something about this. It doesn't matter what size you are to begin with, you can still have a weight problem.